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about
thanks for giving it a go — making this song helped me reflect to get thru some bullshit i needed to face and learn from. still working on it, trying to embrace my scars, be gentle with myself and unlearn deep rooted coping mechanisms. as healing is not linear, this song either : i guess i tried to make it as moody as my thoughts and feelings. special thanks to amadou for letting me put my voice on a beat he randomly uploaded on soundcloud and for being open to co-production. i hope it motivates you not to compromise your worth for inconsistant situations. c’est mort, faut être fairplay.
lyrics
just had a meeting before
(it’s been an hour)
my phone’s been ringin' off the hook i
(i)
wonder why you called me for
(i couldn’t answer)
why you waitin' at my door now
(hein?)
more
(now the nigga want some more)
looks like you want some more
(more, more, more)
of the time that i can afford
(now)
more
i know you want more
(more, more, more, more, more)
more than i can afford
why you gotta do me like that ?
i love it when you’re dressed like that
(fais gouter wesh?!)
now i bet you want some of that ah ?
(what?! What?!)
didn’t mean it like that
(t’as serré?!)
t’admets une chose et son opposé
quoi que je fasse ça n’est jamais assez
l’autre fois tu disais être fatigué
quand c’est mon cas tu veux ruiner ma fin de journée
(faut être fairplay là... Wesh ?!)
mort
(cette fois ci je crois que c’est mort)
cette fois ci c’est mort
(mort, mort, mort, mort, mort)
ouais c’est mort
(c'est mort)
mort
c’est mort
(mort, mort, mort, mort)
more than i can afford
ah ça m’a bloqué carrément ?!
bah ouais je t'ai bloqué
je te bloque parce que tu débloques haha
azi, azi, tu fais trop la maline
après tu t’étonnes qu’on dise
les renois, les renois…
mais toi ça va pas hein ?!
t'façon toi tu m’aimes moi j’attends rien de toi hein
ah?!
bah ouais, c’est le tarif
threw my heart many times on the floor
(how could you do that ?)
feels like yall like to watch me fail
(hein?)
my love was unconditional
(RIP)
i think that i deserve more
mais qu’est-ce qu’il se passe ?
(oh you want more)
on dirait que je m’enflamme
encore plus fort
je vais appeler les pompiers
(pin pon, pin pon)
pour qu’ils viennent me mettre d’accord
va falloir tout réduire en cendres
(yeah im sorry)
avant que tout ça me rende folle
(better do it)
peut-être qu’en me fondant dans le décor
(more)
je récupèrerais le reste de mon coeur
(en, en, plus fort)
qu’est-ce qu'il se passe ?
on dirait que j’en pince encore
je ne peux pas faire semblant
mais sans ça je me sens plus forte
(plus fort)
credits
released December 29, 2019
written and performed by helma
produced by amadou
mixed and mastered by steven bohn
@ la forge à sons
The brilliant Ego Ella May returns with the latest installment in the “Fieldnotes” series, full of searching, gorgeous songs. Bandcamp New & Notable Nov 19, 2023
